RULE #26:
Wear anything that fits.
When I was five months pregnant and still full of jaunty confidence that I was going to be adorable for the entire nine months, my friend Mimi offered to lend me the maternity dress she affectionately referred to as Big Red. It was big. And it was red. Red-and-white striped, in fact. It looked like an awning. There was no way I was ever going to be that big. In fact, I felt a little sorry for Mimi that she'd ever let herself go like that. Fast-forward three months. My brother was getting married. I had nothing that fit. I swallowed my pride (along with a couple of Donut Gems), called Mimi, and asked for Big Red. And now there's a family wedding album in which I closely resemble a festive circus tent. Oh well. Just roll with it. By month eight, no matter which way you turn or what you put on, you're going to look like a beached whale. So relinquish the struggle and let yourself go. You don't really have a choice anyhow. Ever seen pictures of Gwyneth, Kate, Madonna, and Elizabeth Hurley when they were in their final days of pregnancy? They had thunder thighs. Their faces were swollen balloons. They looked . . .pregnant! Now if the best bodies in the world can't fight it, who are you? Give into hugeness. Buy the flowered muumuu. Break out the paisley tent dress from high school. Wear your husband's pants you'll feel almost svelte, and as an added bonus, he'll probably be highly irritated by it. Whatever gets you through the next couple of weeks (they will surely feel like years) . . . put it on.